The Magic Pantry

Does it seem to you that people reach a point in their lives where they just stop learning new stuff? We recently had a baby boy, and I tell friends of my parents that he was “just over three kilos” at birth, only to be met with blank stares. Seriously. The hospital is complicit in this, as they record the birth weight both in metric and as “six pounds eleven”, whatever that means. Folks, we went metric in the 70s. If you’re 60 years old today, then you were in your early twenties when you first heard about kilograms.

I’d like to think that I’m still learning and embracing new ideas, so it makes me frustrated when people my parent’s age choose not to. Sitting on the sofa watching television and wondering out loud about some piece of trivia is fine and all, but did you know you can find the exact answer in the next ten seconds if you want to? The degree of effort is so low (visit Google, type in question) compared to the value (satisfying your curiosity) that it frustrates me that you think it’s “too hard”. And digging out the Yellow Pages from the top shelf of the pantry to look up a phone number for a store that you plan on visiting is equally as ludicrous.

Did you know that Google has been around for a decade? That we were surfing the web fifteen years ago? That email was in widespread use twenty years ago? That you could buy an affordable home computer thirty years ago? Computers are central to our way of life. Many occupations involve using a computer in some capacity, yet the average competence of a computer user is depressingly low. And it’s not because it’s “too hard”, it’s just that people haven’t bothered to learn through experience. Computers are just so alien to them that they prefer not to use them at all, meaning that they don’t pick up the nuances and patterns that you need to be a confident user.

Those of us who work with computers daily aren’t smarter, and we don’t think differently. We’ve just learned the ins and outs. When we fix your computer for you, we don’t magically know the answer, we just go through the obvious steps, and you should be able to do that yourself. I’m just sick and tired of people rolling their eyes and blaming their problems on the computer, “oh it’s the computer”. No, it isn’t. It’s YOU. You just haven’t bothered to educate yourself.

I mean, imagine if you treated cars this way. You were in your twenties when you started hearing about these car devices, but you couldn’t grasp exactly why someone would want one (I mean, I can walk to the shops and get some fresh air and exercise, and I’m quite happy catching the bus to visit friends). You had kids, and they got cars, and drove you places, and they seemed happy with them. You were happy to be a passenger, but didn’t really grasp how the darned things worked. Then you retired, and went out and bought a car yourself. The man delivered it and showed you how to turn it on and off. You’d seen your kids do this, so you hopped in, started it up, drove across the lawn, took out the mailbox, floored the accelerator in your panic and crashed through the neighbours garden and into your house. “Damned new-fangled vehicles”, you complain. “Gargh, they’re always doing that”.

Well, I’m sorry. Driving a car is second nature to you because you studied them, you took lessons, you passed a test (after several attempts, probably), and you spend the last thirty years using one for several hours a day. You learned all of the nuances and tiny patterns that allow you to pilot one without really thinking about what you’re doing. You know that pouring a solution of water and vinegar into the tank when the petrol runs our ain’t going to work, and you didn’t need to perform an experiment to find this out. You know what to do when you get a flat tire, and when the fuel warning light goes on. You know how to take care of it, you know how to negotiate your route with other vehicles on the road, and you even know what to do when something unexpected happens. Cars are no less complicated, it’s just that they seem easy because you use them so much. So, please, do the same with your computer.